Being Flexible with your Former Spouse Regarding Parenting Time

In this video, we'll be discussing the importance of flexibility in parenting schedules for the benefit of your children.

Hello. My name is Bo Luan, and I am an associate lawyer at Feldstein Family Law Group.

In today’s video, I will be speaking to you about the importance of flexibility in parenting schedules.

Imagine this scenario: Your sister is getting married and the wedding is on a Saturday night, but it’s your former spouse’s weekend with the kids. What do you do?

When you realize it’s not your weekend with the kids, contact your former spouse. Give them significant advance notice and ask to either trade weekends or to let you have the children that night. It’s an important event; the children shouldn’t miss out.

What if your ex calls you and tells you that they’ve lucked into a pair of hockey tickets? Maybe your child is a hockey fanatic and you know that she would love to go. But it’s your night with the kids. In this situation, I suggest that you let your child go. You and your ex can figure out some makeup time later if necessary. Everyone will be glad you’ve been accommodating, and it will improve your co-parenting relationship with your ex.

One more scenario. There are some families where one parent refuses to take extra time with the children. And you cannot force more time on a parent. So if you had a wedding out of town to attend without your children and asked your spouse to accommodate that change for you, they are allowed to refuse. Try reminding them that one day in the future they too may have to make a request, and ask that they be flexible now.

I know families that will refuse to make scheduling changes under any circumstances whatsoever. This harms the children and continually damages the relationship between the former spouses. Flexibility is important!

That said, consistency is important too. Do not ask to change every weekend or every month. Schedule your planned time with the children – but do know that certain life events will make it necessary to change the routine.

My point is this: Be open-minded, be flexible, and think about your children’s best interests and the importance of maintaining a good relationship with your former spouse.

If you would like to learn more about this issue or other family law issues, you can visit our website. If you would like legal advice about your own situation, please call us at (905) 581-7222 to schedule a consultation.

I’m Bo Luan. Thank you for watching.

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