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Mediation Protecting Your Family's Interests for Over 30 Years

Ontario Divorce Mediation Lawyer

What Is Mediation?

Mediation is a process in which disputing parties agree to appoint a neutral third party to assist them in attempting to reach a voluntary settlement. The neutral third party does not make the decision, and the parties may terminate the process at any time. It is confidential and without prejudice. Where a voluntary settlement is achieved, it only becomes binding when the parties have concluded a settlement agreement.

In the area of family law, mediation is an effective, non-adversarial method of alternative dispute resolution when parties are attempting to resolve issues related to separation, custody and access, division of property, and support (both spousal and child). However, mediators cannot grant a divorce to spouses; only the court is empowered with the ability to do so.

Mediation offers parties with a less costly, time-efficient and informal process to resolve disputes. It must be voluntarily consented to by both parties. Therefore, in situations where parties have been subjected to either abuse or cruelty, thus resulting in fear of power imbalances between them, it is absolutely crucial that the mediator “screen” the parties to ensure that they satisfy the voluntariness component.

Once you and your spouse or partner decide to separate and/or divorce, you may decide to mediate the issues stemming from the breakdown of your relationship. This is especially true if both you and your spouse are amicable, willing and agreeable to sit down, listen to one another, and effectively communicate any and all needs and concerns you both may have.

Considering mediation? Feldstein Family Law Group P.C. serves all of Ontario and delivers effective legal counsel to divorcing or separating spouses and others who are open to taking a collaborative approach to their family law dispute. Our Ontario divorce mediation lawyers can work to guide you through to a reasonable and swift result.


Call our offices at (905) 581-7222 to get started. We serve Mississauga, Oakville, Vaughan, Markham, and the surrounding areas, as well as Aurora, Newmarket, King City, and other communities in the York Region.


What Is a Mediator?

A mediator is a neutral third party who sits in with the parties that are contemplating divorce and/or separation and guides them through the process. A mediator will help the parties identify the issues that need to be resolved and will help the parties effectively communicate with one another until an agreement is reached. A mediator, unlike an arbitrator, does not have the ability to make any final decisions. The parties must reach the decisions themselves and together.

A mediator cannot give legal advice relating to the rights and obligations of the parties. He or she may, however, educate the parties with respect to legal issues, such as ensuring that the best interests of the children (if any are involved) are consistently considered and promoted. As a result, it is strongly suggested that you seek and obtain legal representation both during mediation and especially prior to signing any binding agreement outlining the decisions reached. A lawyer will be able to analyze and scrutinize the agreement ensuring that it is fair to both parties and equally considers their interests.

As was previously mentioned, the parties must both consent to mediation and the mediator selected. Therefore, you should endeavor to select a mediator who is experienced in mediation and has had considerable exposure to the issues stemming from the breakdown of relationships/marriages.

Individuals who tend to act as mediators are generally (but not limited to):

  • Lawyers;
  • Social workers; and
  • Child care workers.

Impartiality is crucial when it comes to selecting a mediator; therefore neither you nor your spouse should attempt to select or approve a mediator with whom either of you has a relationship, either personal or professional. This might compromise the neutrality of the mediation process and skew the decisions, and outcome, to favour one party over the other.

Mediators are available through either:

  • Private practices;
  • Community groups;
  • Counseling organizations; or
  • The Family Court system.

The Mediation Process in Ontario

Once you and your spouse decide to separate and/or divorce, you should take the following steps:

  • Retain a lawyer.
  • Discuss with your lawyer the diverse methods of alternative dispute resolution that could be employed.
  • Next, both you and your spouse must agree to engage in mediation.
  • Once you have agreed on mediation as the form of dispute resolution, either you and your spouse, or your lawyers, must discuss and determine which issues will need to be mediated.
  • When the issues have been identified, you and your spouse must endeavor to locate and select a mediator to which you are both agreeable.
  • This next step is optional, but we recommend that you follow it. Once you have selected and agreed upon a mediator, either side should draft, review, and sign a mediation agreement stipulating:
    • The issues you are going to mediate;
    • The individual who is going to act as your mediator;
    • Whether you are going to engage in open or closed mediation;
    • The location of the mediation;
    • The procedure to follow should the negotiations fail; and
    • The procedure to follow in order to successfully terminate the mediation.
  • Next, you will begin the mediation process by engaging in the first meeting with your spouse, the mediator selected, and your lawyers (if any have been retained). Depending on the complexity and number of issues that need to be mediated, one meeting may not be enough for full settlement. It is impossible to say with certainty how many meetings are needed in order to resolve a case.
  • At the conclusion of each meeting there will hopefully be an agreement reached on every issue, which will then be recorded by the mediator in a Memorandum of Understanding.
  • You and your spouse should take the Memorandum of Understanding and have it reviewed and revised by your respective lawyers.
  • If there are no problems with the agreements reached and if they seem fair, one lawyer should incorporate them into a valid, final, and binding Separation Agreement.
  • Once the agreement has been drafted, you and your spouse should come together one more time and sign it, in front of witnesses thus ensuring its enforceability.
  • Lastly, comply with the agreement and begin a new chapter in your life!

Advantages of Using the Mediation Process in Family Law

There are numerous advantages associated with mediation and the decision to partake in the mediation process:

  • The process is completely voluntary; therefore you can never be obligated to partake therein. Also, if you decide during the process that you are no longer able to participate and would want to instead engage in arbitration or litigation, the process may be terminated without any repercussions.
  • Rather than leaving ultimate decision-making authority in the hands of a third party, the affected parties retain the ability to make all decisions. This is especially important in situations where children are involved, as the decisions reached can take into account any special needs or circumstances particular to the family in question.
  • Mediation maintains and promotes communication between the parties, rendering their relationship amicable and avoiding hostility. Consequently, this reduces conflict and makes the transition easier on all the affected parties, especially the children.
  • The process is completely confidential if the parties decide to engage in closed mediation, which allows them to be honest and truthful during negotiations as nothing will be held against them in court or arbitration.
  • Potentially the most appealing aspect of mediation is that it is less costly and timelier than going to court to litigate the issues stemming from the breakdown of the relationship.

Disadvantages of Using the Mediation Process in Family Law

There are few disadvantages associated with a decision to partake in mediation. However, you should always keep in mind:

  • Full and final settlement of all issues rests in the hands of you and your spouse. There is not an impartial arbiter empowered with the ability to make final determinations on the issues in dispute, should there be a lack of agreement. Therefore, if the two of you cannot mutually come to an agreement, the mediation fails. Consequently, all the time and money expended in preparation for and during the process is forfeited.
  • Issues that are left unresolved still need to be determined, which means that the both of you will have to incur further costs and waste more of your time trying to finally get everything settled.

Mediation for Children

Many couples who are pursuing a divorce use mediation as a method of resolving issues such as child support, division of property, parenting time, and decision-making responsibility. Mediation is a process where the parties appoint a neutral third party to assist them in making the decision. The process is entirely voluntarily, and the parties may terminate the mediation process at any time. The mediator will not make any decisions, but rather they will assist the couple in reaching an agreement on important issues.

How do I start mediation for my child?

The first step in the mediation process is to retain a lawyer and discuss with the lawyer the various methods of alternative dispute resolution that you could use to resolve your matter including mediation. Mediation may not be for everyone as it requires a certain amount of cooperation and communication between the parties in order to be effective. Speaking with an experienced lawyer can help you to decide whether mediation is a viable option for you and your spouse. After retaining a lawyer, you and your spouse must agree to engage in mediation as it is a voluntary process.

Once you retain a lawyer you can also discuss with them the possibility of your child being involved in the mediation process.

What questions will a mediator typically ask a child?

Whether the mediator will ask your child any questions or what questions they will ask will ultimately depend on the child’s age and the circumstances of you and your spouse’s relationship. If the mediator does ask your child questions, your child will not be asked to choose between their parents as the purpose of mediation is to arrive at a solution that is acceptable for all parties involved, including the children. Another common question that a mediator may ask your child is how you (as their parents) can help them get through this difficult time of their parents separating. Any questions posed to children throughout the mediation process will generally center around determining what solution would be in the child’s best interests

Can a child go to mediation?

Depending on the circumstances of the divorcing couple, it may be necessary for the mediator to speak with the children involved to get their perspective and address their needs during this process. It is possible in some circumstances for a child to attend the mediation, but the mediator will ensure that it is not against the child’s best interests to do so.

For more information regarding whether mediation is a viable option for you and your spouse and the potential role of your children in this process, please contact one of our experienced lawyers at Feldstein Family Law Group.


Contact Feldstein Family Law Group P.C. today to learn more about mediation in Ontario and how our firm can help you. Call (905) 581-7222


Meet Our Dedicated Team of Lawyers

Over a Century of Collective Experience
  • Andrew  Feldstein Photo
    Andrew Feldstein Founder

    Andrew Feldstein graduated from Osgoode Hall Law School in 1992. Prior to focusing exclusively on family law, Andrew’s legal practice covered many different areas, including corporate commercial. One of Andrew’s fundamental objectives is to achieve those goals mutually and collaboratively, as set out by him and his client.

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  • Daphna  Schwartz Photo
    Daphna Schwartz Lawyer

    Daphna Schwartz joined Feldstein Family Law Group, P.C. in 2007 as an associate lawyer. She was previously practising family law in the Barrie area. Her practice includes all areas of divorce and family law, including custody and access, child support, spousal support, and property issues. Daphna is also qualified to practise Collaborative Family Law.

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  • Anna  Troitschanski Photo
    Anna Troitschanski Lawyer

    Anna Troitschanski joined the team at Feldstein Family Law Group, P.C. in 2012. Prior to that, she practised Family Law at a boutique Newmarket firm. Her experience covers all areas of divorce and family law, including custody and access, child support, spousal support, and division of property.

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  • Nick  Slinko Photo
    Nick Slinko Lawyer

    Nick Slinko attended York University from 2003 until 2007 where he majored in both Law & Society and Philosophy. Nick graduated in 2007 with an Honours Bachelor of Arts degree. He proceeded to earn a Juris Doctor in Law at the University of Western Ontario in 2011. Nick was Called to the Bar in June of 2012 after completing his Articling term with the Feldstein Family Law Group, P.C. He became an associate with the firm immediately thereafter.

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  • Veronica  Yeung Photo
    Veronica Yeung Lawyer

    Veronica Yeung joined the Feldstein Family Law Group, P.C. as a summer student in 2014 and returned as an articling student in 2015. Following her call to the Ontario Bar in June 2016, Veronica was welcomed to the team as an associate lawyer.

    Veronica attended York University for her undergraduate studies and graduated as a member of the Dean’s Honour Roll when she obtained her Bachelor’s degree in Honours Criminology.

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  • Shana  Gordon-Katz Photo
    Shana Gordon-Katz Lawyer

    Shana joined Feldstein Family Law Group P.C. as an articling student in 2017. Following her call to the Ontario Bar in June 2018, Shana was welcomed back to the firm as an associate. While completing her articles, Shana assisted with legal matters covering all areas of family law.

    Shana attended the University of Western Ontario for her undergraduate studies, where she graduated as the gold medalist of her program, Honors Specialization in Classical Studies.

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  • Rachel  Zweig Photo
    Rachel Zweig Lawyer

    Rachel joined Feldstein Family Law Group P.C as a Summer Student in 2019 and returned as an Articling Student in 2020-2021. Following her Call to the Ontario Bar in April 2021, Rachel was welcomed back to the firm as an Associate.

    Prior to completing her legal studies and obtaining her Juris Doctor at the University of Ottawa, Rachel obtained her Bachelor’s Degree at Ryerson University with a major in English Literature.

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  • Lauren  Harvey Photo
    Lauren Harvey Associate Lawyer

    Lauren joined Feldstein Family Law Group as a Summer Student in 2020 and returned as an Articling Student in 2021-2022. Following her Call to the Ontario Bar in April 2022, Lauren was welcomed back to the firm as an Associate.

    Prior to completing her legal studies and obtaining her Juris Doctor at the University of Western Ontario, Lauren obtained her Honour’s Bachelor of Arts Degree at Wilfrid Laurier University majoring in Criminology and minoring in Law and Society.

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  • Quinn  Held Photo
    Quinn Held Associate Lawyer

    Quinn spent two years as a Summer Student and then completed her Articling term at a boutique Family Law firm in Orangeville, where she was exposed to various complex Family Law matters. Following her Call to the Bar of Ontario in June 2022, she became an Associate with the Feldstein Family Law Group.

    Prior to obtaining her Juris Doctor from the University of Windsor, Quinn obtained her Honour’s Bachelor of Arts Degree at the University of Guelph majoring in Criminal Justice and Public Policy and minoring in International Development.

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