Dealing with the Police and a Children's Aid Society

with Jason Isenberg

Dealing with the Police and a Children's Aid Society Transcript

Please note: The script may not be exactly what is spoken, but contains the same information as presented in the video.

Hello. I am Jason Isenberg with the Feldstein Family Law Group. When a relationship is breaking down, one spouse often thinks they will gain an advantage against the other spouse by reporting that person to the police or a children’s aid society.

Today, I want to discuss with you some things to consider when dealing with the police or a children’s aid society in a family law matter.

The Police

When a client tells me that the police would like to speak to him or her regarding an incident with their spouse, the first advice I give my clients is not to speak to the police.

There are many reasons why remaining silent is the smartest tactic. In fact, it is your right. Often, clients think that if they speak to the police, they can talk their way out of being charged with a criminal offence. That’s why they are very eager to speak to the police.

One pitfall is that you do not know what your spouse has told the police. And you do not know if the police fully believe the story your spouse has told. In speaking to the police, you may corroborate a fact that ultimately leads to you being charged. Had you refused to speak, you may have not been charged at all. The safest path is the best path. Until you know the full story, you should exercise your right to remain silent.

A Children’s Aid Society

When a client tells me that a Children’s Aid Society would like to speak to him or her regarding a referral that we know has come from his or her spouse, the first advice I give my clients is to cooperate with the Society.

Before you begin any dialogue, here’s how the Society works. Each Society has been given the broad task of investigating whether a child is in need of protection, and that can involve taking referrals regarding at risk children from a professional like a doctor, a concerned citizen, and often separated spouses.

Here’s the key point to remember about the Society: the Society is trying to assist your children, not you.

Although the Society does consider the motivation of the referral source in deciding how it should proceed with an investigation, please remember that the Society is “a shield and not a sword.” This means that the Society is predisposed to protecting children from harm rather than pointing fingers. A referral from a doctor who is genuinely concerned with the welfare of a child—that’s a shield. A referral from a separated spouse who has something to gain in a custody battle—that’s a sword.

The Society must still consider investigating every referral, but keep in mind they are conscious of being used by separating spouses who are in a custody dispute.

The Society is essentially trying to gauge the risk level with a particular child. So, not cooperating with the Society will make it more difficult for the Society to assess risk and ultimately close their file. In fact, a parent who is not cooperating can be perceived as a risk factor in and of itself, and can be part of the puzzle in determining whether a child needs protection.

While I advise clients to cooperate with the Society, again, be aware that their mandate is to help children, not you.

These are just some of the things you should consider when dealing with the police or a children’s aid society in the context of your family law matter.

You may want to consider retaining a lawyer to guide you through your family law matter and to advise you on dealings with the police and a children’s aid society. Thank you.